Weijian Zhang
2017 2016
06 05 04 03 02 01
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Laptop is dying. Struggling with tabs. What the hell. The battery situation is not that great either.

V brought up needing a security system. Or cameras at least. We need to fix the garage entrance door. It's the most vulnerable spot. So I've got a burglary to look forward to. It's really going to happen. And car accidents. Those are extremely likely things to happen in my future. I can't avoid them. I have no control over them. I can only deal with their aftermath. What the hell. What else. Unemployment. That's bound to happen. I'm going to get fired or the company will start laying people off because it will lose the big account. Lots of bad things have such high probabilities. I can see them happening so clearly. Whereas I can't see anything good happening in my future. I can't even get a fucking raise. Bitcoins won't get anywhere. The stock market will crash, inevitably. I wouldn't be such a pessimist if it didn't seem to make so much sense. Things will veer toward disaster if left to their own devices, if I don't actively tend to them. Because I'm passive and lazy and weak, things are going to crumble around me. They wouldn't even need my uselessness to devolve; I'm just helping them along. I didn't even think to get a security camera because I'm so tunnel-visioned and can't think past my own head.

What even happened today? Portobello mushrooms at Whole Foods salad bar, good.

OKCupid, here we go again.