Maybe me dating V is not so hopeless after all?!?! I had a very good time at the Caspian show with her. I was apprehensive throughout the day up until the first act was over and I led her closer to the stage. There was a nice pocket there, right in the center, and I stood at ease and opened up my chest and spread wide and looked and breathed. Caspian was going to play next and I talked easily with V about whatever. We tried to take selfies in the dark room. That was great. Then Caspian played and everything was alright. The edges of the room dissolved, the power of live shows is amazing. My whole attention was on the stage. Earplugs off. My senses latched on, sight and sound. It affected my breathing.
I want her to break up with her boyfriend and move back! How do I make this happen! I can move to Chicago? I won't belong. The problem seems to be only about housing. She can stay with me! In the basement? Ugh.
I had great feelings and memories tonight. Love it.
Went to the gym in the morning, that's always a plus. Then sought out a buffalo burger. I don't think that was enough. I had a regular green danube with the apple this time. Tasted great. I should be normal about that more often. Finally wrote up the stupid documentation. It's pretty lame and weak. Whatever. I did it. I can chalk that up as done. Saw J the HR lady, but she didn't see me? I left and she saw me and said hi outside with her kid. She has a mean resting face, but is ok nice. Genki, strawberry ice cream with lychee. It was weird, won't get that combo again. Napped and sweated in car, worrying about the sugar on my teeth. Drove over to V's house. N and Y made me a sandwich. That was awkward, with me standing there getting served. They left. V gave me some of her brother's kombucha. Didn't explode. At this point I felt way too indebted and fidgeted. Finally we left and I drove to the show.